I'll See You In Your Dreams
by Alicia
Summary: Will gets a visit from a ghost lover


Basic Disclaimer: Paramount created Star Trek: TNG and all characters. I do not own any of this, I'm just borrowing it for the purpose of this story. 

Copyright December 1999 

Dedication: Do I have to have one? Okay...how about to Kate. Yeah..thanks Kate and uh..this one's for you (??)

Author's Notes: This is pure smut about what happens when Deanna dies and haunts Will. It's short, sweet and to the point. 

I'll See You In Your Dreams  
By Alicia 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

Just as she had come into the world, she left it. No apparent reason for her death, no word of explanation or goodbye. She just silently slipped away, a peaceful expression across her beautiful face. It was almost as if she knew she was going to die. When he had found her, alone and still in her quarters, she was laying on her bed, dressed in a lovely white dress, simple in design, but striking nonetheless. Her hair was pinned up on her head except for a few strands loosely draping across her face. Her feet had been bare, but in her hands, she had held a leather bound book. 

The book was filled with words of encouragement and love, written in her flowery handwriting. There was no title, and it seemed to be a journal of some type. Now as he stood in the pouring rain banging on her mother's door, he was besieged by a million different emotions. Love, fear, sorrow, regret, curiosity, anger . . . 

Why had she left him? Why was she clutching that book? Why was she dressed for death? What would become of him? How could he live without her? Why did he wait so damn long to tell her he loved her? 

His hot, bitter tears rolled down his cheeks like liquid fire, burning his skin. The rain drops mixed with the tears, making them seem combined. He couldn't tell where one started and the other began. Finally, Mr. Homn threw open the door and stood looming over Will. "Mr. Homn. Is Lwaxana here?" His voice sounded strange, cold and sad. It cracked with more tears he had yet to shed. The butler moved to the side and let Riker in. 

The house itself was as beautiful as he remembered it to be. A bit lavish, but still breathtaking. It was warm, and the temperature change from the cold rain outside sent a shiver through him. He turned to Mr. Homn, but the man was gone. Wiping away the last remnants of his tears, Riker turned to find himself face to chest with the butler, who was holding out towels to the drenched commander. Gratefully taking one, Will dried his hair, face and neck with the soft downy material. He thanked Mr. Homn and turned to the staircase. Slowly and deliberately, he made his way up the elegant stairs and turned to Lwaxana's room. He started to knock, but Lwaxana's voice greeted him from behind the closed door. 

"Come in, Will." He turned the knob and opened it slowly, sliding in through the crack. Lwaxana lay on her bed, a box in front of her and a tiny smile on her face. "I knew you'd come." He joined Lwaxana on the bed, neither noticing or caring that he was drenched. She slid the box over to him, and he took it, peering inside curiously. He wanted to pretend that the items in the box had no effect on him. That seeing her things from so long ago didn't pull on his heart. But he couldn't. 

Lifting a piece of vine from the Jalara Jungle out of the small box, he felt a tear slip down his cheek. He set it down on the bed beside him and reached back in the box, pulling out the white headband she had caught at Chandra's wedding. He held it up to his nose, inhaling the faint scent of her hair that still rested there. 

Ten minutes passed and everything had been emptied from the box. The contents had been carefully placed beside him, memories of the past twenty years lay scattered about on a bed on Betazed. While she lay in a coffin in the Troi family mausoleum. His hands worked numbly as he lifted the items back into the box. He turned his eyes back up to Lwaxana, noticing for the first time how fatigued she looked. "Lwaxana . . . can I go to her room?" 

She stared at him quietly for a minute, her onyx eyes reminding him too much of her daughter. Then she gave a slight inclination of her head. "Of course. I'm sure the things you're truly looking for are in there." He wasn't clear on what she was talking about, but he stood silently and moved towards the door. "Will." He turned around. "I know she loved you. More than anything can ever show. Don't put too much into her material items. You were her imzadi. Look at that. Trust in that. That's where you'll find strength." 

~*~ 

The rest of the day had been exhausting. After going over every inch of Deanna's room on Betazed, he had transported back to the ship where he had gotten nothing but sympathetic looks and forced-cheerful chitchat from people he barely recognized. Beverly and the captain had kept their distance, knowing he needed his time alone. The rest of the crew had good intentions, but as each person passed, he missed her more and more. 

Finally alone in his quarters, Will sunk down onto his bed, draping an arm over his eyes. It had been an hour since he'd cried, and he couldn't decide if that was good or bad. Her face constantly floated through his mind and every once and awhile he could have sworn her smelled the faint scent of gardenias. He rolled over and smelled the right pillow, hoping for a whiff of her scent. His fingers slipped underneath and hit something solid. Curiously, he lifted the pillow to see the leather bound book. He narrowed his eyes and picked it up, and pulled himself into a sitting position. 

"I thought this was with Beverly . . . " Had she brought it in and slipped it there for him? That must be it. He flipped to the back, expecting to find the last five pages blank, as they had been when he'd last seen it. But the pages were full, and in Deanna's handwriting. A shiver trailed down his spine as he read the words. 

_~ Will, _

If you're reading this, than everything went as expected. Please don't cry for me more than you already have. It was my time to go. Don't ask why or how I knew, because you'll never find the answer. When you found this book the first time, I was dead. Yes, I AM still dead, but I was right about it being my time. 

I don't know if I ever explained that to you. When a Betazoid dies, he or she goes to the area of resting. If it was not their time to go, they can come back to the living as a different person for 24 hours to finish their business. If it was their time to go, they can come back in whatever form they choose to say goodbye. 

As you're reading this, I'm probably here. Yes. Here. In your room. Don't freak out. I'll be leaving soon. I just wanted to let you know that I love you and I will always be here. Look for me in your dreams, and at night as you awake and think you're still dreaming. I'll be there. Please know that I never wanted to hurt you. I saw your grief when you found my body, but perhaps it will bring you some kind of peace to know that I'm happy. And I did not take my own life. I would never leave you willingly. 

You are now and forever my Imzadi, even though I'm not her physically, keep me in your heart as you will always be in mine. Stay safe and I'll see you in your dreams . . . 

I love you always,   
Deanna~ 

He closed the book and his eyes darted around the room, wishing desperately he could see her. If she had been right and she was still there, he wanted to hold her. But all he saw was the monotony of his quarters. "Imzadi. If you're here . . . I love you and I'll never forget you." He closed his eyes as he felt a warm breeze flutter over him and stop on his lips. It felt soft and breezy . . . like a kiss from a butterfly. 

And then deep within his mind, he heard her sweet voice, a distant echo. _"I have to go. I love you . . . Imzadi . . . "_ And then the voice was gone. He closed his eyes and let the smell of gardenias slowly lull him onto the bed and into a deep sleep. 

~*~ 

He couldn't be dreaming. It was too real to be a dream. She was there. Alive and visible. Just as beautiful as the last time he'd saw her. He started to speak, but she pressed a finger against his lips. "Ssh. No words tonight, my love. Just feeling." 

And then a haunting melody filled his mind and she was close to him, feeling as alive as ever. She was warm, and breathing on his neck, the smell of her hair intoxicating him. He ran his hands down her body, relishing every curve that he thought he'd never get to feel again. And suddenly out of nowhere, the most beautiful bed appeared. It had lavish purple blankets and fluffed pillows that matched the color of her dress. 

As they made love . . . him and his ghost lover. . . everything was as perfect, even if only for one moment in time. He had her again, though only at night. 

~*~ 

Waking up each morning alone was the hardest part of all. After a night full of passion and pure romance, he wanted to hold her close to him as he greeted the day. But everytime he woke, he was greeted with the scent of gardenias and a whispered promise in his mind: *I'll see you in your dreams, my love . . . * 

T   
H   
END 

* * *


End file.
